Eris in Mythology, Empowerment after Trauma, and Dysfunctional Family Patterns
Truth and Consequences of Misplaced Anger and Damage. What is it like having an Eris mirror held up to you?
Eris is the dwarf planet, the Greek Goddess of Discord and Strife. Eris is an archetype of both the abuser and the abused, and how they both can be intimately intertwined in one person.
If you find this hard to believe, there are many examples. It is often only the third party who have gone through this process, and can walk their talk - the heart-healed - that may comprehend the significance of both understanding, and healing these dynamics. Eris is about relationships, also relation with Self.
Healing is vital, so that the abuse don’t proliferate into others lives, which is surprisingly easy, especially in a family. It is even worse, when a person who still holds anger, unforgiveness or resentment towards a parent or sibling, snap in one moment, to hurt an innocent bystander. Sometimes it’s the undeserving, who unwittingly holds up a mirror and activate the trigger, for the things an abuser doesn’t want to face, and end up getting hurt.
Those who have travelled this path know the importance of owning it, and coming out of denial. Eris square Pluto is making the last two exact square aspects to each other in August and October 2021 but will be within orb until 2024.
If you were the player or assassin who wanted to take another out, who hurt another after being triggered, and you want to heal a broken relationship, or ask for forgiveness; you better be ready to forgive those who hurt you in the first place, otherwise you may keep repeating the pattern, bestowing what is unconscious in your dark heart, from a deep-rooted woundedness, trauma or a critical spirit, onto those who don’t deserve it.
Why should those who stood at the undeserving brunt of your unresolved psychological baggage, renew a relationship with someone, who refuse to attempt to heal themselves, or might quite possibly hurt them again in the future? It’s not a matter of hurt people hurt, it’s a matter of vindictive, unforgiving people hurt others. It’s never fair. Eris the Goddess of Discord and Strife is intimately connected with unresolved anger, mental instability, power-plays and dysfunctional relationship dynamics of childhood, perpetuating into other adult relationships. Ready to look in the mirror, are you? To examine Eris and Pluto energy together at play?
The Narcissist/Empath Dynamic is Eris in Astrology
Eris in Aries is asking us to find balance and make right choices. Healthy selfish vs toxic selfish. The empath needs to learn how to become more discerning and logical on those who want to take advantage of her by destroying her life. And not to give to others to the point that she is depleted. Also, not to be in denial of red flags, and give toxic people second chances, when they don’t deserve it. And the narcissist has to learn to get out of denial, recognise that they are an orchestrator of chaos, instead of making those selfish bad choices that disadvantage others, and manifest bad outcomes for everyone. By employing narcissism to scheme and plot against another, to control, subdue or assassinate. In relationship, the empath gives too much freely, to be that Eris positive influencer angel, and the narcissist does the ‘giving with one hand, and taking away with the other’ dynamic, to keep people stuck and be the Eris negative influencer devil.
This is the mental magic with illusions to get another to think that they have power over them. Manipulating and controlling another's free will, through backbiting.
Taking someone’s good nature as an open invitation to be a complete asshole. To try to cause them to self-destruct from the inside out through psychological warfare. The cause and effect of damaging another person is huge…
Even though these lessons may be extremely challenging and painful to overcome, it is ultimately highly rewarding for those who are willing to do the work. Many people oscillate between these states, as they learn, grow, and see the rewards of making better choices, and ultimately elevate. There is no judgement. With Eris, there is great potential for alchemy, which is why these heavy topics are so rewarding to explore.
Eris higher expression people are sweet, heart-felt, caring, abundant, and intuitive, and this is the heart of the problem; the Eris lower expression wants to turn this sweet person upside down, perhaps even knock them out of their position, perhaps so they can try to fill their shoes. It’s the Eris polarity of vice versus virtue; getting achievement, status or satisfaction from causing suffering for another. Inverting another person; for a selfish gain.
If this triggers the reader too much, please read the disclaimer.
The following may not be for everyone…
Blame Game and Attaining of Control:
Understanding the Accusations of the Narcissist in Authority. And Why the Reminder of another’s high Self-worth, Confidence and Joyful Self-Expression may Infuriate them, and Remind them of their own Lack.
And why players are tripped up by what they refuse to look at within themselves. Blind at the real source of their self-destruction. Blaming the innocent for their own low self-esteem instead. Causing injustice or trauma for the innocent as a result of their own blindness.
Many wonder why some players or narcissists (Eris lower expression) may influence a person or others to see a higher expression Eris energy person, like an authentic child (Eris higher expression) as bad.
Eris higher expression people are truth-seers, they feel, sense, smell and know bullshit, which is why they are targeted, smeared and demonised, and are shamed for their feelings and knowing.
Eris’ discovery chart shows how narcissists aim to steal another’s emotional nourishment in relationship. This is how they are made to suffer… by turning all their relationships on them… isolating them in their inner torment…
Some narcissistic adults don’t like truth telling and truth seeing children, because when they are in their emotional stability, kids may see the f*****y down to the last detail; the instability, insecurity, the lack of authenticity, the lack of confidence, the pretence, the envy, the bad feelings. So some deranged adults may choose to mess with these children’s stability… which may cause immense emotional, mental or psychological damage, pain, suffering and trauma… and may cause those children to become
deranged adults… just like the narcissist. This abuser/abused Eris dynamic needs to be understood… Secure people make those with these issues that they refuse to face, have to confront their inner demons. Many don’t want to look in the Eris mirror, which are the mental health issues experienced during Eris transits.
These adults may falsely accuse, demonise, backbite or insult the person who see through their bullshit, or who see behind the facade, to rattle or trigger them, to lie or turn on them, into not seeing the truth. It’s a game of control. These adults may want negative Eris influence over others, and may use their own dirty deeds, to lie and make others go crazy. To cause an injustice, with accusatory blame and backbiting. To make the innocent experience Eris discord of the heart, due to f*****y. To make them stoop to their level. To get people out of character, so they appear to be crazy. Putting someone in a state of depression, to feed off of their energy, and feel very powerful.
A narcissist’s accusations, may actually be truths about themselves. A narcissist’s accusations may be confessions about themselves. The accusations may be what is wrong with them, thus dissociating themselves from their own f*****y.
But innocent children may not understand the vitriol aimed at them, due to them seeing the truth, being stable, confident, loving, innocent, sensing and happy. They may not understand the dynamic, nor the logic of an adult, to flip the script, project their inadequacies, and make another look, or think they are guilty, of what the adult had done. To silence the person who witness truth, put them in a mental trap, or worst case, make them just like them… To steal their spirit, joy and their happiness, and make them wicked and low vibrational, like them. Damaged. Perverse. Desecrated. Paranoid. Crazy. Anti-social. Traumatised. Brutalised. This is Eris lower energy, and its dynamics need to be examined… The evil needs to be understood, so that it is not propagated onto innocent parties. Children may feel like they are never good enough. Why? Fault is always found with them. They are judged and criticised. But simply put; it may simply be a case of energy stealing, to steal another’s self-confidence, and derive a feeling good from it.
If this triggers the reader too much, please read the disclaimer.
The reason for this exploration is to see how to apply alchemy. To allow for your growth and enlightenment. To allow for your discernment to be enhanced. Perspective is everything. Rise above the adversity that broken people may bring; become healed, and be blessed.
It is curious how higher expression Eris energy adults, return to a state of purity, joy, innocence and high confidence, and explore their maverick and creative genius, being great gifts to humanity due to their healing and recovery from living in this world, filled with broken people.
Higher expression Eris energy brings influencers a pack of happiness-haters, stability thieves and joy-destroyers. Their success and wellbeing triggers low vibrational people. There is great benefit in understanding the dynamics. Being happy and healthy. Growing and glowing. Not allowing broken people to destroy your life force.
Eris and Complex, Dysfunctional Family Dynamics, Lack and Blame
Firstly, it is important to mention that Eris is intimately tied to relationship with Pluto, in multiple ways, as discussed in the Discovery chart of Eris article.
Astrologers often think of Pluto in terms of severe family dysfunctions, but Eris takes this to whole new dimensions. Eris, the Greek Goddess of Discord and Strife came from a severely troubled family; a real vipers nest of dysfunction.
Adult cold-hearted Eris individuals can become severely unhinged, and can cause severe damage to, and for other people. Why? Because they can’t let go of their own past, and they can’t let go of their own trauma. And because of this they may cause injury, baggage or emotional burdens for others, to keep them in a mental prison as well, so they stay stuck in their heads years after dealing with their abuser. Why? So that the trauma lingers, and the toxic (Plutonic) grip is maintained. It’s a cycle of abuse that is easily perpetuated; one person becoming both the abused, and the abuser; who may pass the baton of trauma and stuck energy onto the next…
“Define Trauma
Trauma is the response to a deeply distressing or disturbing event that overwhelms an individual’s ability to cope, causes feelings of helplessness, diminishes their sense of self and their ability to feel a full range of emotions and experiences.
It typically involves the loss of control, betrayal, abuse of power, helplessness, pain, confusion and/or loss.
Traumatic situations that cause post-trauma symptoms vary quite dramatically from person to person. Indeed, it is very subjective and it is important to bear in mind that it is defined more by its response than its trigger.”
This cycle of abuse may be intent on causing another tremendous pain and injustice, perhaps deliberately aiming that they would be roiled up in such agony, perhaps never enjoying emotional freedom again… The intent may also be to block that person at every turn, to see them stuck, unable to receive blessings.
Now that we understand that underneath the righteous rage and anger that stir during Eris transits, lie a deep well of personal sorrow due to disempowerment, we can follow the breadcrumbs, and connect the dots.
I don’t think there were happiness, loyalty, or honesty in Eris’ family unit. I think there was severe lack, insecurity, unrequited love, and lack of reciprocation. Perhaps also a lack of sincerity, lack of nourishment, lack in trust? Perhaps dangerous disregard, loneliness, starving for care and kindness, and disrespect. Those who kept each other, and their offspring under a boot of trauma-bonging disempowerment, via an array of abuse of power, or hurt people hurt narcissism.
Family Roles and The Desecrated Basketcase
To desecrate someone is to treat them with violent disrespect and to spoil or vandalise their goodness, with pettiness. To damage them. Hubris is a dangerous character flaw: the intentional use of violence to humiliate or degrade.
In the book Eris or Proserpine?: In search of the real name and meaning of a new planet, author Raimo Nikula describes that each family has its psychological balance, based on the way each takes its place, in its role. There are families in which either the father is absolutely dominant in the old-fashioned way, or the mother, or they are fighting for the dominant grip. One may have had to sacrifice their own talents, to the dominant person’s authority. The position of children can vary, but there is often a scapegoat. The one who is blamed and piled with all the psychological pressures, becomes labeled the black sheep; who does things the family abhor, breaks taboos of the family etc.. There is always a catalyst, or a power play, that triggers the family insecurities and vulnerabilities, that may make that person the habitual Eris psychological wastebasket, and perhaps also the angry and somewhat deranged basket-case. Why? The fuming, deep rage at the deliberate injustice of being bestowed that unwanted role, and the shock of family betrayal, and seemingly having no choice but to accept, or put up with the crap. Blame in conjunction with psychological projection of inadequacies were described in great detail in previous articles. It creates incredible anger and rage…
“Define Basketcase
A person who is unable to function normally or properly, due to overwhelming stress, anxiety or the like. Someone who is functionally incapacitated from extreme nervousness, emotional distress, mental or physical overwork, etc
A basketcase is common word used to describe a social outcast in school. Some characteristics of a basketcase included emotional instability, weirdness, and constant isolation from mainstream society. A basketcase is often independent and isolationist, in other words, anti-social. This word was widely used in the 80s.”
The Scapegoat: Cause and Effect of Habitual Blame, Slander and the Resulting Grudges
Eris might have been instrumental in precipitating the Trojan War, but did she cause it? No. This article speculates that Eris may have been at the habitual receiving end of scapegoating since childhood, and it infuriated her. There’s a sneaky part in the Judgement of Paris that is often ignored, which is that Paris was asked to choose. It was Zeus, who foresaw the huge likely consequences of choosing among three goddesses, who asked Paris to make a choice. This is so easily overlooked, because when a group of people have decided on a person to be the scapegoat, or a wastebasket for all the bad feelings that they want to disown, and shift onto another, they want to maintain that dynamic. To keep them stuck in those bad emotions. Why? To avoid feeling guilt or shame. Players thus continuing with morally questionable behaviour, projecting their inadequacies on another, and getting away with it.
The scapegoat is the person who carries the unexpressed information of the group; who has to be silenced, and kept in check. Expected to feeeeeel the crap of everyone else, and put up with it as if they are a dirty piece of shit. Players want her to feel how they feel.
This role is so part of societal conditioning, that we have a blind spot for it, yet we are not ignorant of it. Why? Because nobody wants to take the blame for others, yet there is a strong visceral knee-jerk reaction - like an electrocution - in everyone, when it is sensed that the scapegoat will take the blame no more… For who will it be assigned to next???
Who wants to be the piece of shit for all the players, including the evil-spirited, when they are innocent?
Image: Paris the shepherd with Eris’ apple of discord, via Wikimedia Commons. Click to enlarge.
How did we get to these archaic societal rules of engagement? The denial and the injustice of the backbiting? How did we come to think that this is okay? To make a toxic dumping ground out of another human being with mind f*****y and dishonouring behaviour, and avoid being honest with ourselves about it? And are we prepared to accept the truth and the far-reaching consequences?
Individual and societal changes have to be made. Can each individual take responsibility, instead of creating denial, projecting it onto others?
Truth is uncomfortable, which is why society has such trouble with it. Telling the truth is what causes people to be turned into black sheep.
The truth teller who sees the bullshit of those who are in denial, is the very reason why the narcissistic behaviour comes forward, to target and make the truth-seer the dirty outsider, just for seeing, or for putting negative attention on the inauthentic's shenanigans.
People struggle to be Self honest, especially those of poor character who want to pretend, backbite, and have everyone invested in their pretence.
In what way are we culpable, and have contributed, to our societal ills and circumstances, and the mental health of the scapegoat… who then acts out in violence and misplaced anger at being desecrated and smear-campaigned?
Can we accept the truth being pointed out to us? That we are in fact dropping the ball? Is avoidance and escapist behaviour ultimately rewarding? Can we integrate and become self-aware and emotionally mature?
Why do players play, bullies bully, and enviers envy?
It’s all about the good energy of another which they cannot find inside themselves, due to their own bad choices. So they seek to destroy. Mythology shows how people like Paris and Zeus’s emotional fulfilment depended on screwing others over with bread-crumbing and other tactics.
Social Influence and Maintaining the Stronghold
These are the evil-spirited players who want to win pre-eminence, devising a plan and letting everyone be persuaded of their superiority; that their rights should come first.
It was so much easier, and unfair, to scapegoat and slander Eris. Blame should have been more equitably spread amongst all the parties involved.
According to this website: "Eris is shifting our understanding of cause and effect. If we only see the causes that are part of the narrative of the dominant paradigm we miss the hidden parts of the system – Zeus and his actions to begin a war with Troy, for example. Without realising quite why, we are plunged into battle, seemingly with little choice on the part of anyone involved. But always, there is that hidden driver. Eris unwittingly exposes it."
This is why Eris pokes at those individuals in power, and those authoritarian structures, with their self-serving conflict of interests that they deny. And this becomes their self-undoing, due to the way players go about their business, which in many cases are evil, sneaky, unethical, or at the very least… questionable… Zeus wanted to keep the “social order” in place, how people perceived him as leader, and his place in structured society. Very much like the media today try to control what people believe through mainstream media and television. Zeus wasn’t going to take the blame for having started the Trojan War, was he? The discovery chart of Eris, as well as her association with Persephone, Demeter and Pluto, shows the intertwined dynamic between Eris and Pluto energy, and why an overbearing authoritarian figure can both disempower, and invariably empower Eris. It’s fascinating how her story always features a powerful authority figure in it, and how this interaction with those who project their uncomfortable shadow onto others, can pull Eris into herself, to look for her light within.
“Define Conflict of Interest
1. a person has competing interests or loyalties because of their duties to more than one party;
2. a clash between personal (or self-serving) interests and professional duties or responsibilities. Such as vested interests, —like money, status, knowledge, relationships, or reputation—which puts into question whether a person’s actions, judgment, and/or decision-making can be unbiased. ”
Below are some of the main themes and characteristics from Eris’s discovery chart, symbolised in images. Seasoned astrologers may pick these up quickly as they explore the story that is presented there…
The observant author Raimo Nikula also makes reference to an old joke that says: “Pluto doesn’t take hostages” - it kills them. Evil Eris seems to take hostages, to keep them alive. It is all too clear that Eris in mythology struggles with her own psychological growth. In the cold-hearted expression, she is in self-torture, to the point where her deranged and complex childhood relationship dynamics, can cause her to be so abusive in turn to others. This abuse can be so insidious in adulthood, it may even cause “Stockholm syndrome” in an abused person; where the captive feel under the spell of a captor, perhaps being in such denial and self-protect, that they are seeing them through the eyes of ‘love’.
Raimo says, to understand Eris, we have to think her as a part of a mythic family, which present subconscious urges and motives stemming from closeness - mixed feelings of dependencies between mother and father and their daughter. In this mythic triangle, Proserpine/Eris easily becomes a pawn in power games between other family members.
Eris issues are intimately tied to, and rooted in the family relations.
Even if an adult moved to a different continent, they may come across another individual who exhibit those behaviours and offer those triggers, that caused pain or disempowerment in the first place, in order to facilitate the opportunity for self-healing. This mirror is they way with Eris transits. Through strife and discord, an individual is offered the opportunity to look at what they had been in denial over.
With Eris, the origin story is everything!
Those who wish to grow psychologically, into emotional maturity, would be wise to look there.
Previous articles have already explored, that underneath the huge anger and righteous rage at the backbiting, lies a deep well of personal sorrow.
Unfortunately, the world cannot wait for individuals to finally make that step to get counselling, get wiser, or grow up. Eris square Pluto energy is currently taking a stand for change NOW... which is why there is so much chaos collectively in the world. An Eris transit is stressful and confrontational, and people need to find coping strategies, spaces of refuge, healthy distractions, and above all, be kind to themselves, and everyone else. Eris excavates deeply for those things that people have been hiding away from, and been in denial over for many years.
Eris doesn’t create the problems, she exposes what is already there. Perhaps festering since childhood disempowerment and abuse.
And during these highly emotionally charged times, Eris may utilise this time in Co-Vid lockdown to put us in a ‘winter freeze’ phase. An opportunity to feel the emotions rising, allow them, letting the tears fall, so that a huge transformation may occur, and a total change; rebirth.
The reason why Raimo Nakula explores the dynamics between the myths of Eris and Proserpine/Persephone in his book, is because initially astronomers wanted to name the newly discovered dwarf planet; Persephone or Proserpine. Unfortunately, both the names were already taken, and they settled for Eris instead. Raimo’s exploration is very important, as there are some very important parallels, and clarifications offered, which are also explored in another article. It’s really a great book, well worth exploring for insights, and deeper understanding.
In the Greek mythology, what Eris was blamed for and silenced for, was the brainchild of Zeus and Themis, to create immense discord in the heart at the wedding feast of Peleus and Thetis. To lead to the infamous injustice of the Judgement of Paris, as well as the Trojan War and the death of the Age of Heroes… who Zeus feared might overthrow him. All of this was blamed on Eris… and the illusion kept in place by the illusion-maker… Zeus, king of Olympus.
Symbols of Death, Transformation and Rebirth
Leaving the Diabolical Cat and Mouse Games behind
Which are a series of cunning manoeuvres designed to thwart an opponent. This game playing is what needs to fall away…
This is not a physical death, but a psychological process which involes the disintegration of an old Self, to make way for a more authentic and true Self. According to this article, the symbol of the Ouroborus originated in ancient Greek and Egyptian mythology and represents a dragon or a snake eating its own tail. The Ouroborus (to the left) is seen as a symbol of death and rebirth. A snake/dragon dies by eating itself but is reborn through self-fertilization. In the 17th and 18th centuries, images of Ouroboros could be seen on gravestones, and this symbolized reincarnation of the deceased. The Ouroborus has also
been used as a gnostic and alchemical symbol, to say that things never disappear but keep changing, and are destroyed only to be recreated.
There are many other similar symbols used through time, to describe this process, like the butterfly, the Phoenix bird, the moth, the scarab beetle, the lotus flower, the tree of life, the easter egg, the new moon and the starfish. The lotus flower has been considered a symbol of rebirth, regeneration, and enlightenment because the lotus emerges from muddy waters and blooms during the day, then closes up and retreats back into the water at nightfall, only to repeat the process the next day. In ancient Egypt, the closing and reopening of the lotus petals symbolised the dead entering the underworld, and their reincarnation. Due to this symbolic meaning, the ancient Egyptians used the lotus flower in tombs and wall paintings. In Buddhism, the lotus is often depicted with the Eightfold Path, a guide to reincarnation and enlightenment. In Buddhism, a popular symbol for nirvana is the Buddha meditating over a lotus flower.
The Phoenix Rising and Eris square Pluto
Eris is currently square to Pluto and will make two final exact aspects in August and October 2021. The Phoenix also originated in Greek Mythology, just like Eris. It is described as a bird which could live for a long period, and when the time comes for its death, it would burn up and become reborn from the ashes. A more integrated Self is re-born. A similar legend is also found in Ancient Egyptian Mythology.
The fabled bird is said to have a life span of around 500 years.
A full transit of Pluto around the sun is about 248 years.
A full transit of Eris around the Sun is about 556 years!
An interesting give away, isn’t it? Both Pluto and Eris have been associated with the Phoenix Rising experience, however, Eris may be a more accurate reflection of the full expression of the energy. Pluto transits are known to be powerful, wiping the slate clean for a fresh start, so to speak. But Eris transits may prove to be superior as an agent of total change, meaning the potential restoration of the authentic Self, Soul Self or Higher Self, via a reconnection with emotional and quantum energy (as explained elsewhere on this website).
The Phoenix emerges from a catastrophe, stronger, smarter, and more powerful. This expression symbolises that a person has arisen from flames born anew, beating life challenges, and defeating hard times.
Modern additions to the myth in popular culture say the tears of the phoenix have immense healing powers, and if the phoenix is near one cannot tell a lie. This gives further strength to the idea of letting the tears fall, and be authentic with your Self during truth-telling Eris transits, in order to capitalise on her energy. Continually morphing, the phoenix represents the
idea that the end is only the beginning. Ancient civilisations had knowledge of these matters, and built them into their myths, tales, stories, plays and fables to be passed on through the generations, as a gift of knowledge, to make life easier for following generations.
Eris asks us to make very clear choices about our own empowerment, self-respect and value of Self, no longer using suffering as an excuse.
Rising and elevating instead into healthy feeling and sensing.
A judgement, clarity and resurrection of sorts. Allowing the Wheel of Fortune to spin in your favour after injustice, is an Eris process.
What does the ego mind, the negative entities, Zeus, Paris etc. hate most of all?
People who elevated above them into a stable, abundant and joyful life. This is why the character assassins target innocent people they envy.
The BALANCED Eris higher expression person is very much aware of human nature and relationship f*****y, and have to live an aware life, despite of it.
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Eris Goddess of Discord Family Linage: Parents/Siblings/Children
What Happens When We Give In To Low Vibration Emotions and Actions, and we choose not to leave the cat and mouse games behind?
What happens when an evil-spirited person want a hold, or a tight toxic grip on another, someones causing drama and trauma to achieve it. Forceful and deliberate trauma-bonding has far-reaching consequences…
Image: The goddess Nyx (Night) in a 10th-century Greek manuscript, the Paris Psalter. According to 8th-century BC Greek poet Hesiod, Nyx was the daughter of Chaos. Here Nyx is labelled and shown nimbate with a dark complexion, with dark clothes and a starry mantle, and holding an inverted flaming torch. The full image shows the prophet Isiah flanked by Nyx and the Dawn (labelled "daybreak"), depicted as a boy carrying a flaming torch upright. The manus Dei appears to the top. The scene illustrates the Book of Isaiah 26:9: "In the night my spirit rises early toward you (possibly eagerly seeks you), O God, because your ordinances are a light upon the earth" (NETS) via Wikimedia Commons. Click to enlarge.
Eris in the extreme negative expression, is the deliberate infliction of mental and emotional suffering and anguish of immense proportions, on another. It is said that hard-hearted Eris rejoices in the pain, and havoc that is created on the battlefield, among the tumult of war and bloodshed. Eris was called the Lady of Sorrow, known to be untrustworthy by the Olympian gods, which is also why they were careful not to provoke her, for the potential of evoking her deadly nature is ever present. We know that in childhood is where we often first get triggered by other people, get hurt by their rejections or invalidations, and build defence mechanisms to protect ourselves. It seems Eris got rejected and disempowered quite a bit, if we read the online stories. She was unloved, unheard, discounted, excluded etc. Pay close attention to those around her, who she associated with intimately, and their names, that reveals their character. It would seem that Eris was the youngest or close to it, of all her siblings:
Parents of Eris:
There are different views on Eris’ lineage.
Homer who wrote the Iliad states she is the daughter of Hera and Zeus, and the sister to Ares.
Greek Poet Hesoid claims she is solely the daughter of Nyx (Night). The (Greek goddess of the night) water spirit’s shadowy appearances are sparse in surviving mythology, but reveal her as a figure of such exceptional power and beauty that she is feared by Zeus himself.
Hyginus claims her parents are Nyx and Erebus.
Maternal Siblings of Eris:
Homer, Iliad 4. 441 ff (trans. Lattimore) (Greek epic C8th B.C.) :
"Eris (Hate) whose wrath is relentless, she is the sister and companion of murderous Ares."
Hesiod, Theogony 211 ff (trans. Evelyn-White) (Greek epic C8th or C7th B.C.):
"And Nyx (Night) bare hateful Moros (Doom) and black Ker (Violent Death) and Thanatos (Death), and she bare Hypnos (Sleep) and the tribe of Oneiroi (Dreams). And again the goddess murky Nyx, though she lay with none, bare Momos (Blame) and painful Oizys (Misery, Pain, Distress), and the Hesperides . . . Also she bare the Moirai (Fates) and the ruthless avenging Keres (Death-Fates). Also deadly Nyx bare Nemesis (Envy, Indignation, Retribution) to afflict mortal men, and after her, Apate (Deceit) and Philotes (Friendship) and hateful Geras (Old Age) and hard-hearted Eris (Strife)."
Pseudo-Hyginus, Preface (trans. Grant) (Roman mythographer C2nd A.D.) :
"From Nox (Night) and Erebus [were born] : Fatum (Fate), Senectus (Old Age), Mors (Death), Letum (Dissolution), Continentia (Moderation), Somnus (Sleep), Somnia (Dreams), Amor (Love) --that is Lysimeles--, Epiphron (Prudence), Porphyrion, Epaphus, Discordia (Discord) [i.e. Eris], Miseria (Misery), Petulantia (Wantonness), Nemesis (Envy), Euphrosyne (Good Cheer), Amicitia (Friendship), Misericordia (Compassion), Styx (Hatred); the three Parcae (Fates), namely Clotho, Lachesis and Atropos; the Hesperides."
Image: Eris via Wikimedia commons. Click to enlarge.
Children of Eris:
According to Greek poet Hesiod, Eris is the mother of a variety of allegorical spirits or beings, which are the causes or representatives of man's misfortunes.
Her children were Ponos (Hardship), Lethe (Forgetfulness), Limos (Starvation), Dysnomia (Anarchy, Lawlessness), Ate (Ruin, Blindness, Folly, Delusion, Clouding of the mind), Horkos (Oath), the Algae (Pains), the Hysminai (Battles), the Makhai (Wars), the Phonoi (Murders), the Androktasiai (Manslaughters), the Neikea (Quarrels, Grievances), the Pseudologoi (Lies, Falsehoods), the Amphilogiai (Disputes), Logos (Words), Momos (Blame, Criticism).
What a warmongering, dysfunctional family is this?
No wonder hard-hearted Eris was the Goddess of Arguments, the first one to start one, and the very last to close one. Perpetuating the dysfunctional family dynamics that she grew up in, into adulthood relationships, going with her brother Ares, the god of war, onto the battlefield to have fun, satisfaction and violent retribution. Everyone is born innocent, with human needs for nourishment, but with the disadvantage of such a family tree?
Spite, Getting Retribution, or Victory over Another
Spite is based on pre-existing emotions, it doesn’t come out of nowhere.
In this family there may have been plenty of opportunity for pent up anger and rage, since Eris seems to have been the youngest, or close to it. There may have been a desire to really physically harm some of her siblings, brewing in her heart. Why? Because they are so dysfunctional or f****d up. There may have been a swirl of emotion (think loathing, hate) yet hesitation to trigger retribution if vengeful emotions were acted on in the family. Perhaps, initially, Eris as girl, could not act in that aggressive manner while she was with her family, yet she may have been sneaky, behind-the-scenes instead, more like a puppet master, to sow her revenge with discord and strife.
Knowing exactly what will cause chaos, by doing it covertly, pushing just the right buttons. Perhaps relying more on being psychological, manipulative, or strategic to take her more ‘feminine’, or emotionally motivated revenge.
And in this process, her family might have reflected to her how bad her behaviour was; perhaps even how evil she was. And perhaps
the emotions were stuffed down, as it goes in many family units, perhaps causing her to become even more emotionally toxic, as she could not be “good”, perhaps envying those who came from “more normal families” who were good. The roots of the toxic behaviour often lies in some painful childhood emotion, like feeling rejected, guilt or shame, having built up a grudge, and now desiring an opportunity to cut the other in turn. To find a weapon to punish anyone and everyone. Causing an injury may make an abuser feel emotionally satisfied and justified in the malice, perhaps even soothe their insides. Those who commit such retributive acts see themselves as having been victimised, and now unleashing revenge on the other. They may even make the chance calculation that, while their actions may hurt them, it may harm the object of their hostility substantially more. This may explain why adult feminine warrior goddess Eris went on an ego-driven rampage on the battlefield to find “what gets her on top”, delighting in her ability to finally be able to give violent expression to the raging torrent inside.
This an unnecessary self-destructive over-reaction, and self-defeatist “solution” to how a family relation problem, became a personal problem.
Raging Emotions: Finding Relief vs Healing
Still the person who is having swirling feelings… may delight in spite, for how it makes them feel. It can be seductive and alluring. It clearly fuelled Eris to fight even harder. Indulging in spiteful acts, can become addictive, and provide a false sense of relief to the vengeful imaginings of feeling exploited, taken advantage of, or being deceived. It’s hard to believe, but being the victim can generate a “feel good”; when taking retribution makes us feel victorious. The perception that the compensation doled out, was worth it. It’s such a perversion, considering what we already know, because these emotions just grow larger, and larger, growing perhaps to the point where the perpetrator becomes as angered as the abuser.
It's easy to underestimate the repercussions of vindictiveness, while in this “getting satisfaction” state. The motivation is emotionally based, therefore the judgement may get clouded. Read more on spite in this excellent article.
Despite giving free range to her destructive pent up rage, Eris eventually comes to realise that the harm she inflicts to foil an opponent, may well cause her own self-destruction as well.
You might compare such a personal defeat—or disaster—to Confucius’ famously ironic adage:
“Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.”
Also see the story of Eris, in the form of the dynamics between Demeter, Persephone and Pluto, and how the feminine finally learnt to balance herself with the help of integrating the darkness of the unconscious underworld, surprisingly, with the help of Pluto.
Also see psychologist Dr Ramani’s 17 minute video which is gold when it comes to understanding Eris with the discord in her heart, and the strife in her relations, in the modern world.
Eris: Self-Healing Journey
Times when Eris stations, and turns direction, are times when her real nature is intimately revealed. People experience extreme anxiety and sleeplessness. These are intensely stressful times when people worry, ponder, they ask why? In the mental struggle, they try to justify or rationalise things, that perhaps take people down dangerous rabbit holes or conspiracy theories. People question: what is wrong with me? We need to learn to access the energy and move the energy; but the energy felt during Eris transits is not only mental, it is emotional. When the mind is given free-range, it can go real crazy, but when the emotions are allowed and sat with in silence, it may bring a person to a grounded state, where the visceral emotions can move through the body, and out, instead of staying stuck. Relief can be found this way. This understanding alone is worth its weight in gold.
I personally found tremendous emotional release, and relief from doing the SES Workshop. It shows why the abuser/abused dynamic have to go, on an individual level first, before it is slowly integrated elsewhere in the human collective. Give it a go if you feel this resonates with you. Also see another article below:
Looking in the Liberating Mirror of Eris
Eris transits are times when people are faced with situations where they have to look in the Eris mirror. And what they see there, may be downright frightening.
Having this Eris mirror held up to you, by being emotionally triggered by the those around you, perhaps due to something you have been hiding away from for years, produces FEAR.
Seeing your own vulnerability and insecurity reflected back at you, creates anxiety and the triggering of an ego protection mechanism. Those who are in the good habit of taking responsibility for Self, may pause and self-examine. But most people go into psychological projection mode, which blames others in that moment instead. Overthinking often makes others out to be something they are not.
This lack of accountability and denial of the truth about how ‘bad’ they were, is how psychological self-deception, and then lies and falsehoods to others, start. The truth can be too hard to face. They may be incapable of going to those depths, because it may be too much of a death blow to the ego, pride or self-esteem. If they tell themselves the lies multiple times, they may start to believe them.
They may fight anyone who tells them a version or different perspective, that they don’t want to hear; where the truth is told. Many don’t want to be that bad guy. Perhaps they want to avoid feeling bad feelings as well; the guilt or shame.
This may make it near impossible to humble themselves, or take accountability. They don’t want to take true responsibility for themselves, so their mind may lie to them, and they believe the lie. Creating an imaginary world, where they are not wrong. They are not aware, nor open to being in reality. It’s a coping mechanism.
This may be why those around them may choose to end the relationships; they are not willing to keep the peace with the argumentative person, nor give them a pass to live in a self-constructed imaginary world of preference. Living in this make-belief land is unhealthy.
With Eris square Pluto transits, people realise that they are doing themselves dirty, when they indulge in untruths. But some people’s egos can’t survive owning up to the truth, even if it is just to themselves. They can’t own up, be humble, truthful, nor whole-hearted.
Remember, Eris problems grow into gigantic proportions when not appropriately addressed, as shown by the mythological story of Heracles and the golden apple of Eris.
Part of this protection mechanism, may include manipulation or wearing a mask; making that person lonely, confused and withdrawn in their own self-destructive world. They may be deliberately avoiding transformation. They may be deliberately avoiding the obvious. They may be holding their own Self in this stuck place, not trusting their intuition either, because when you shy away from the truths your emotions are presenting to you, you’re in a maze.
People who are in a deep habit of not facing their shadow, may not be able to feel anything due to repressing their emotions over a long period of time. Perhaps they feel numb to heartache, numb to pain, and numb to what they see in front of them. They may be lost, and due to their persistent depression they may become complacent, afraid to let go of control. They may be intimidated, afraid to take off their deceptive mask they hide behind to avoid being vulnerable. They may not be able to enjoy the present moment, because they haven’t been able to clear our the energy of past hurt. This defensive energy may be hindering their emotions, feelings or spiritual growth. They may continue to attract the same types of people, in order to get a mirror image, of what needs to be looked at.
This is why hard-hearted Eris people are drawn to emotionally mature, heart-centred people, for that feel good feeling, and also for a mirror in which they can look in, for what they can’t see about themselves. Unfortunately, the moment they get triggered, the mechanisms kick in again.
The subconscious mind is a replay of everything you’ve experienced, especially those things you yourself want to hide away from. Looking at the emotions rising to the surface during Eris transits, and allowing them in a grounded manner, may ultimately bring you great rewards, like emotional freedom. But if you don’t work with Eris energy responsibly, it can work against you…
Responsibility vs Perpetuating Blame
It’s always someone else’s fault, isn’t it? Stop turning a blind eye.
There is a great benefit in understanding astrology, and what a rich life this awareness and comprehension may provide. The planet Saturn teaches about taking responsibility, which is something many people loathe to do, but that is only because they are ignorant, and they have no understanding, of the amazing life that can be lived, if you allow Saturn energy to be your teacher, and a trusted, benevolent friend. What you sow, you do reap. It is time to stop making psychological wastebaskets out of other people, and realise your responsibility to take responsibility for your Self. And acknowledge when your bad behaviour is wrong. It is time to take responsibility for a healthy emotional life, allowing your Self to feel all that life has to experience, not repressing anything, nor becoming an emotional sceptic tank. Constantly blaming other people, and not taking responsibility for your Self, is actually really stupid… and self defeatist.
Responsibility for Self
The party who are hurt by hard-hearted individuals - surprisingly - also have a responsibility; to Self. There needs to be a healthy discernment and detachment, learning that other’s lack of getting themselves out of their personal problems and burdens, are not your circus and not your monkeys. We cannot carry everyone else, or their burdens will weigh us down, or may even pull us into ill health. We are not responsible for them to make good decisions. We can be the sacred witness, but also become teflon. We need to be honest, and take responsibility for the emotional pain that we have experienced, even when it was unjust, unheard, and undeserved. You have to acknowledge how these people make you feel. There is also another lesson: accepting that some of these people will never change, even though they may pretend that they have, to attempt to fool you; and being ok with that.
You cannot really change other people, you can only change your Self. This is real alchemy. In deciding if you wish to apply the logic and understanding of the concepts mentioned above, test their integrity through the wisdom of feeling, so you can enjoy those heart-centred epiphanies.
It may be a juggling act to understand Eris energy, and readers may have to read the other articles on this website, to understand the information in this article better. Understanding Eris energy, and being able to embrace both the light and dark expressions, is an impressive feat indeed. And understanding how to utilise this information, to create an abundant life, well worth living, may be a great blessing!
With Eris, there may be a faulty thought pattern, or a cognitive loop, that may cause us to always rush to the wrong conclusion, instead of the reality of a situation.
There is a wounded perspective that may need changing, that colours things, that is often rooted in childhood denial. There is an ending of some sort, that an individual may need to submit to, before they can enjoy those abundant rewards of true liberation lived. Instead of being defensive, fighting or feeling trapped, which is the psychological protection mechanisms that tend to kick in, and make a person feel restricted, you need to give yourself a bit of space when doing Eris work. A step back from a situation, to allow the solutions and answers to flow in, so that you can from a better, and a bigger picture perspective. Prayer and medication are good as well.
The Power of Forgiveness; for New Emotional Experiences
Forgiveness doesn’t change the wrongs done, or the dysfunctional family patterns, but it can set an individual free from the various persistent emotions that rise during Eris transits.
Putting up healthy boundaries is good, but putting up defensive barriers may be preventing new emotional experience from coming into your life. If you are able to heal these aspects that Eris transits ask for you to look at, experience and allow, you can detoxify old anger, blame, and unforgiveness you may have been holding. If you can clear this heaviness, it may open up new opportunities to joyfully live in the present moment, and form healthier relationships.
Ultimately, we are never responsible for other people’s growth, or lack of growth. There has to be an acceptance, that some hard-hearted narcissists want to stay narcissists. And some heart-centered individuals want to reach amazing highs by learning and growing, being their authentic Self, that sets them apart from everyone else, and they are willing to do the work. People can choose to be inspired by this example, or they can stay in the dumps and green with envy, by their own choice.
May you have victory and success in ushering in these blessings for your Self. Getting out of denial and into personal accountability and authentic Self, can be very rewarding and empowering.
Ultimately, Eris-work may bring an individual to where they are at peace with Self; this is priceless.
Eris teaches us to claim and own our feminine power, to always have your own back, and trust your Self, not caring what the rest of the world may think. Radically accept yourself fiercely and wholly.
Feminine power is beautiful, graceful, nurturing, creative, and warm. There is power in being. There is power in silence. ... Feminine power is focused on feelings and emotions, and the light of the soul.
It is a person’s high self-worth and joyful self-expression that may have started this whole battle in the first place, and becoming aware of the Narcissist/Empath dynamic, and how to live with it, is very important.
Dates for the Exact hits for Eris square Pluto, and Eris transits 2020- 2028
Transit Eris in Aries squares Pluto in Capricorn five times causing opportunity for growth and awareness. The dates are:
26 January 2020
14 June 2020
10 December 2020
27 August 2021
9 October 2021
Personal planets will continue to stir the trigger points with conjunctions.
In orb October 10 ~ Feb 11 2023
In orb April 8 2023 ~ December 26 2023
In orb July 27 2024 ~ November 2 2024
Leaves November 3 2024
Starting in 2024 to 2028, Eris and Chiron will be conjunct in Aries.
In 2027, Saturn will start its conjunction to Eris, going into 2028.
We are going to see this energy for some time to come…
Better learn to deal with the energy sooner, rather than later.
Take responsibility for your Self is the antidote.
More articles on Eris in Astrology:
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Related:
At the end of the day, you’re special and rare
You are what you attract, which is victims of past pain and hurt
This Person Is A Complicated Hot Mess But Here’s What You Need To Know About Them
A Complicated Hot Mess (Extended Reading)
How narcissists discover your vulnerabilities and use them against you
The lies they tell themselves/humble yourself or don’t come at all
The plot thickens! Someone wants out now not later!
Asteroids & Their Mythology Part 2: Eros, Psyche, Eris & Hygieia
Your New Beginning Has Always Been Here, You Just Had To Let Go of The Past